Marnie Simpson has revealed she considered committing suicide aged 17 after her mum 'abandoned' her to live with her boyfriend in Los Angeles.
The tearful Geordie Shore star said she 'didn't want to be alive' and cried all day for more than a year after her mother Sharon Kyle went abroad to live with her online partner for four years.
Appearing on Channel 5's In Therapy, the 25-year-old also admitted she has spent £20,000 on two nose jobs, lip and cheek fillers, liposuction and two breast lifts in a bid to fit the ideals of reality TV.
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Ordeal: Marnie Simpson has revealed she considered committing suicide aged 17 after her mum 'abandoned' her to live with her boyfriend in Los Angeles
While recalling her traumatic teenage years, Marnie was told by therapist Mandy Saligari to get 'emotionally naked' in Wednesday's episode.
She admitted: 'I was only so young I had nothing. It was a very tough couple of years. Probably the darkest of my whole entire life.
'I literally used to want to kill myself. That's how depressed I was. I just didn't even want to be alive.
'I used to just cry from morning till noon and night. I didn't leave the bedroom for more than a year.'
Tough times: The tearful Geordie Shore star said she 'didn't want to be alive' and cried all day for more than a year after her mother Sharon Kyle went abroad to live with her online partner for four years (pictured together last year)
Her cousin and Geordie Shore co-star then revealed: 'Marnie went off the rails. She had a breakdown.'
The reality star lived miles away from her nearest relatives and - struggling to fend for herself - took to partying to forget her troubles.
'I would just go out and party for days because I just never wanted to go back home, I was so down and depressed,' Marnie recalled.
She admitted that she had lost so much weight that her mum almost didn't recognise her when she came home.
Honest: 'I literally used to want to kill myself. That's how depressed I was. I just didn't even want to be alive,' she said on Channel 5's In Therapy
Seeking solace: The reality star lived miles away from her nearest relatives and - struggling to fend for herself - took to partying to forget her troubles
'When my mum eventually came back she said she was speechless at the state of me. I was so skinny and so gaunt in the face.'
Simpson confessed that she can trace a lot of her 'insecurities' back to her turbulent teenage years.
Talking about her 'social media obsession', she said: 'Reality TV is all about looks. I get called a slut on social media. I get annihilated from head to toe. In this industry looking good is key.'
Despite being 'the prettiest girl at school' Marnie has now spent £20,000 on cosmetic procedures but still finds fault in her appearance. 'It can become a really stressful way of living,' she admitted.
Surgery fanatic: The 25-year-old also admitted she has spent £20,000 on two nose jobs, lip and cheek fillers, liposuction and two breast lifts
The Geordie beauty also revealed she has been hospitalised twice due to alcohol consumption and admitted that Geordie Shore is 'car crash TV'.
She became a 'professional drunk,' after getting a Facebook message asking if she wanted to go on the show - when she was 21 and on the dole.
Simpson now struggles with the negative side of partying, confessing: 'I drink for a living. I binge drink really badly.'
Marnie also defended her steamy shower scene with ex-boyfriend, TOWIE star Lewis Bloor, on Celebrity Big Brother.
Discussing her full-frontal nudity in the episode, she said: 'I'm just quite an open person. It was so romantic. I'll never regret that.'
Marnie Simpson fans have praised the star for her tearful In Therapy session where she discussed feeling suicidal, binge drinking and having sex on TV.
The Geordie Shore star told therapist Mandy Saligari that she felt suicidal when her mum Sharon Kinney left to go and live in Las Vegas to live with a man she met online when Marnie was just 17-years-old.
Marnie Simpson won praise from fans for her appearance on tonight's In Therapy
Although she just wanted her mum "to be happy," Marnie acknowledged she went off the rails, constantly partying and not eating while her mum was away.
She said: "I just wanted to kill myself. I wanted to cry morning, noon and night.
"The best thing I should have done is go to Vegas and lived with my mam, but I had a controlling boyfriend who stopped us from doing that. He was very violent, jealous and controlling."
Her mum was shocked at the state of Marnie when she returned from Vegas, with the star looking gaunt and ill.
Sharon Kinney discussed her daughter Marnie on In Therapy
Fans were quick to praise Marnie's candid appearance and said they'd seen another side to the hard-partying exhibitionist reality star.
One tweeted: "@MarnieGShore being so brave for speaking out and I have lots of respect for her!☺️ #intherapy."
Another added: "I'm really feeling for @MarnieGShore on this #InTherapy show tonight. And I love this therapist. Fascinating stuff."
A third said: "Saw @MarnieGShore in a completely different way. What a beautiful girl."
Saw @MarnieGShore in a completely different way.. what a beautiful girl ❤️ #InTherapy — shez 💐 (@SherridenMorris) January 3, 2018
I'm really feeling for @MarnieGShore on this #InTherapy show tonight... And I love this therapist. Fascinating stuff. — leanne bayley (@leannebayley) January 3, 2018
@MarnieGShore being so brave for speaking out and I have lots of respect for her!☺️ #intherapy — Shannon (@__Shannon_x) January 3, 2018
Omg @MarnieGShore you are so strong have so much respect for you ❤ you are a strong woman love you #InTherapy — Nicola (@Nikkianne5) January 3, 2018
Hats off too @MarnieGShore. So honest and truthful, shes such a lovely girl and im glad shes shown people her true self. Love her 😍 #intherapy — mortley (@scottmTMUK) January 3, 2018
#InTherapy with @MarnieGShore was such a good watch. Such a lovely girl who wears her heart on her sleeve ♥️ love her. 😌 — Jordan Rae (@jordanrae316) January 3, 2018
The star also discussed how she struggled to feel "normal" growing up without her dad after he left her as a baby.
Marnie kept in touch with her dad - who remarried - through her paternal grandparents, but it wasn't always easy.
She told the therapist "Sometimes I'd go to Nan and Grandad's and he wouldn't turn up."
When pressed on the issue, Marnie broke down and told Mandy: "I just find it easier to block it out."
Marnie broke down when she talked about her dad
Marnie, pictured as a youngster with her dad
Elsewhere Marnie addressed her partying lifestyle on Geordie Shore, insisting boozing is how she makes a living and insisting that having sex on the show doesn't "bother her."
She even described her notorious shower scene with ex-beau Lewis Bloor on Celebrity Big brother as "so romantic."
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But she did admit to a a string of health problems including "dry kidneys" and an inflamed bladder, and said: "I've been told they aren't the normal kidneys of a 24-year-old."
Furthermore, she said she'd been told she needs to eat and drink healthily and moderate her alcohol intake or her bladder condition will get worse.
She said: "If I drink alcohol it's not going to heal."
Admitting she has been a binge drinker "from the age of 16," Marnie confessed she'd like to cut down on her partying, but said that "not one person would tell me I have a problem."
MARNIE Simpson has said she would have “loved” to be in an all-girl Celebrity Big Brother house.
The Geordie Shore star came fourth on the show back in 2016 and embarked on a romance with her now ex Lewis Bloor during her time in the house.
Instagram Marnie Simpson says she would have liked to be in an all girl house
But last night the 25-year-old revealed she wished things had been rather different as she saw eight female celebrities enter the house for a few days of women only.
She tweeted: “I would of loved a all girl house 😭 #CBB (sic).”
Her friend and former CBB contestant, Nicola McLean, jokingly replied: “😂😂😂😂😂 wonder why? 🤷🏼♀️💁🏻♀️.”
Marnie told her: “Haha we both know why hahahah.”
The reality star, who is currently dating Casey Johnson, famously came out as bisexual in 2016.
Channel 5/Ruckas Pictures Ruckaspictures@btconnect.com Office (UK) : Marnie fell for Lewis Bloor during her time on the show in 2016
Flynet Pictures She is now dating Casey Johnson
She said at the time: “I'm constantly worrying, so why don't I just come out and say it? I think it's empowering.
“I was constantly thinking about it. I already feel better to just say it. When I was 19 I realised I would look at some girls in a different way. I've always kissed girls but I don't think I took it seriously till I had an encounter with a girl last year.”
She continued: “To me, that was different because it was just me and her. It wasn't for any other reason than I wanted to, so it made me think differently. I'm still a bit hesitant to have a full-blown relationship with a girl, but I do think it would be a possibility.”
Last night saw eight women enter the famous house - Made in Chelsea star Ashley James, Ex on the Beach's Jess Impiazzi, Malika Haqq, soap actress Amanda Barrie, Boris Johnson's sister Rachel Johnson, Ann Widdecombe, India Willoughby and former detective Maggie Oliver.
On Friday men are set to join them and so far Shane Lynch, John Barnes and Jonny Mitchell have been confirmed.
Getty - Contributor The star is very open about being bisexual
Marnie Simpson strips naked for a skinny dipping session on Single AF
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SHE started off a humble bar girl but now Marnie Simpson is a TV regular - famed for her public and often dramatic love life.
She is now set to lay out her life on Channel 5's Celebrities In Therapy. Here is what we know about Newcastle's ultimate party girl...
Getty Images Marnie Simpson is a reality star known for Geordie Shore and Celebrity Big Brother
Who is Marnie Simpson? What is her background?
Marnie Simpson was born and raised in South Shields, near Newcastle on January 17, 1992.
Before the 25-year-old found fame from the reality show, she worked pulling pints behind a bar.
Her humble life was never short of drama though as she was given 150 hours of community service for her part in a “crash for cash” rip-off, in which a stag party faked a smash and claimed compensation for whiplash.
She also faced court after apparently getting caught up in a nightclub brawl, although the charges were dropped.
Despite her brushes with the law, Marnie appeared as one of the finalists in the Miss Newcastle competition in 2012.
Splash News The reality star is known for her wild antics
When did Marnie join Geordie Shore?
Marnie shot to fame when she joined the cast of Geordie Shore in 2013.
The pretty brunette still remains a key cast member of the raucous MTV show.
In the first series alone, she was seen hooking up with Scotty T and Gaz Beadle, causing a rift between the two pals.
She also came out as bisexual during her time on the show and has had a long-running on/off storyline with co-star Aaron Chalmers.
Marnie has become known for her wild party lifestyle, and her willingness to bare all after downing shots.
The star temporarily left the Geordie Shore house in 2015 after getting engaged to Towie star Ricky Rayment, but returned by the end of the year after the relationship broke down.
Thanks to Geordie Shore Marnie is famous for getting her kit off, and she wants to be the first star from the show to model naked for Playboy.
Splash News Marnie dated Geordie Shore so-star Aaron Chalmers on and off for two years
When was Marnie Simpson on Celebrity Big Brother?
Marnie came fourth on Celebrity Big Brother 2016.
Marnie definitely left an impression during her time in the CBB house - splitting audiences with her wild antics and frank discussions on sex.
During her time on the show, she performed oral sex on a banana and admitted she once pooed on someone during sex.
Her sexual antics with Lewis Bloor also caught the attention of viewers.
Recently, Marnie finally admitted to having "secret sex" with Lewis Bloor in the CBB house "in the bedroom and shower".
When quizzed by MTV about her Big Brother sex antics, Marnie confessed: “I think they didn’t want to put it out there. We were so sneaky.”
She also told the Big Brother's Bit On The Side audience: “You’ve just got to be really really quiet.”
WENN Lewis and Marnie got close in the Celebrity Big Brother house
Why did Marnie and Lewis Bloor split up?
The Sun Online exclusively revealed that while Marnie was away filming the new series of Geordie Shore on Valentine's Day, Lewis cheated on her with a woman he met outside of a Drake concert.
After discovering his betrayal, the heartbroken star labelled him a "f***ing scumbag" in a rant on Snapchat.
It was later revealed that while on a romantic getaway to Barcelona shortly after leaving the CBB house, Lewis had cheated on her again.
He publicly posted a grovelling letter of apology and later revealed that he was going into therapy to tackle his jealousy and insecurity issues.
In an attempt to salvage their friendship Marnie and Lewis took a trip to Dubai, but relations between them hit a low point when Marnie threw a glass of red wine in Lewis's face and accused him of stealing her credit card.
Since then Marnie has admitted to jumping out of a moving car during a row with Lewis, and accused him of wanting to "kick her head round like a football".
Now a year on from their CBB romance, Marnie and Lewis have been criticised by Stephanie Davis for "copying" her own liaison with Jeremy McConnell.
Not one to take criticism lying down, Marnie clapped back at Steph, calling her a "mess" and saying she's delusional.
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Is Marnie dating Aaron Chalmers?
Marnie and Aaron have a very on/off relationship.
They are mainly back on when they are in the Geordie Shore house together.
Speaking to Star magazine, Aaron said: "I think we will get married. I'm joking. But we are getting on the best we ever have. I'm glad I got my best friend back. I love her as a person, but I'm not in love with her."
And, although he's adamant he doesn't have romantic feelings for Marnie, the 29-year-old heartthrob thinks there's a possibility the pair of them with "hook up" again.
Pressed on whether they would sleep together again, he said: "I would never say never. I like it the way it is now and that we're getting on. That's always been me and Marnie. When I was speaking to her last week she was saying different."
He added: "We'll always flirt, ever when we're both in relationships. We are in a house together with no phones, it just happens. It's all friendly, it doesn't go further than that."